Four New Innuendo-riffic Posters From The Spirit!

Yahoo! Movies has premierd four new posters from Will Eisner’s The Spirit in glorious sound-o-vision. Click on this link and hover over each photo to hear the characters speak their respective lines.

And because I live in the third world hellhole that is the Philippines, I can’t seem to find a way to embed the flash player here. Anyway, here be the posters

Sarah Paulson is Ellen Dolan.

 (THREE MORE POSTERS UNDER THE CUT!)

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New Hellboy II, The Dark Knight, Punisher: War Zone Posters!

Nothing too fancy in this entry, just some sweet-ass new posters from Hellboy II: The Golden Army, The Dark Knight, and Punisher: War Zone.

I didn’t think that Universal could top the Drew Struzan-made Hellboy II: The Golden Army one-sheet which they released at this year’s New York Comic Con, but they managed to do just that, with this stunning poster courtesy of Comingsoon.net.

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New Dark Knight Poster; Fraser Confirmed for G.I. Joe

The Dark Knight’s Joker-centric viral website, whysoserious.com, has been updated with the posting of a gallery of America’s most prominent historical figures, all of whom appear to have been clownisized.

But if you hover and click over the knife on the top right portion, you will be able to access a not-so-secret page featuring the film’s new poster, which I absolutely just love. I just can’t help but wonder how many people will be up in arms with cries of "9/11 much?! Boo!"

Because you’ve got to admit, that sure looks a lot like the Twin Towers’ facades after they got hit by those jumbo jets back in 2001.

Anyway, if you look at the bottom part of the gallery page, it appears that we’ll be hearing from The Joker in four days. 

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MAJOR Spirit Updates; Iron Man Announcement

Three hours and counting until the ticker hits zero. Could we finally be treated to some long-awaited footage?

But before we get lost in the hullabaloo as to what the countdown really is for, here are a couple of Spirit-related stuff to satisfy your palate: A new motherflippin’ awesome poster courtesy of AICN, the first official photo of Eva Mendes as Sand Saref courtesy of Yahoo!, and news on a collector’s figure which will be released by DC in December.

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Hulk Angry! Hulk Take Spirit Week Hostage!

Hulk just kidding! ^_^ Hulk not squash you, pop cap in your ass, nor stab you with prison shiv. Hulk just here to show new poster for his new movie, The Incredible Hulk.

Ooh! Hulk also has news from New York Times saying that Edward Norton is a real douche. Hulk spoke to Edward Norton and ask if this is true.

Edward Norton was like: "Nuh-uh!"

And Hulk was like: "HULKKNOERITE?!"

Anyways, Hulk go back to hanging out by the beach and drawing pictures of unicorns. Also, kicking puny humans. Laterz!

Weekly Roundup: 04/07/08 - A Day Late, A Buck Short, But Supersized!

Apologies for the day-late Roundup. I was on vacation in Batangas where, I swear to God, I spent half the time on the beach with a shirt and an umbrella over my head, sitting beside my sunbathing girlfriend, and giving mean looks to any douchebag who might stop, stare, and mack on her.

Dude, you were sitting on the beach with an umbrella. Why would any guy be afraid of you?

Well I had a gun, thank you. Jackass.

But to make up for the delay, I’m going for another twelve news bits as opposed to the usual ten. So lace those cowboy boots and yippie-ki-yay your frail, old aunts out of their death beds (?) for another gun-slingin’, dial-up-disregardin’ good time with the Weekly Roundup! Late, but Supersized!

1. Screen legend Charlton Heston passed away over the weekend at the age of 83. Sadly, his last two major appearances on screen were as his gun-loving, crazy, old, farty self in Michael Moore’s 2002 documentary, Bowling For Columbine, and as Professor Walter Finlay in Jean Claude Van Damme’s The Order, which was released on local shores as Jihad Warrior.

And for the obligatory Heston retrospective: One of the first DVDs I ever owned was Ben-Hur, which was a gift to me from my Mom and Dad. It was a double-sided disc with the snapper case which Warner has now discontinued production for. God, I hated the bejesus out of that movie. But he will be missed. I doubt that anyone can quote a more iconic sci-fi movie line than “Take your stinking paws off me, you damn, dirty ape!” If you think you can, then you, sir/ma’am, deserve a cancer to the face.

2. USA Today has some updates from the set of Bond 22, a.k.a. Quantum of Solace. Quite notably, they have a photo of James Bond running up a flight of stairs! zOMFG!

3. Matthew McConaughey has been offered the role of Thomas Sullivan Magnum IV, better known as Hawaii’s only mustachioed, crime-fighting private dick, Magnum P.I. in (What else?) Magnum P.I.: The Movie. The film will be written and directed by Rawson Marshall Thuber (Dodgeball: A True Underdog Story).

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I Am A Genius of Unspeakable Evil; I Also Have X-Files 2 Stuff

So I was going about my usual Friday morning of drowning puppies and compiling articles for this weekend’s Roundup when I came across two interesting pieces that I just had to share with you ASAP. And lighten up, with the puppies. I was just kidding. I love puppies.

I can’t say the same for geese, though. Stupid geese. I wish all the geese in this planet would die! FOR GOOD!!! FINITO!!! CAPICE?!

Anyway. X-Files 2 poster, courtesy of xfilesnews.com. Sweeeeeet.

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